Poor Widdle Jay Cutler

BL has a housewarming gift for Jay when he gets to Chicago!

Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

The NFL's resident poster boy for cwybabees, Jay Cutler, has been traded to the Chicago Bears.

Of course, Tampa was chasing him. You think that would make BL happy, huh? No way. Cutler's an immature little douche. Yeah, I get that he was upset about possibly being traded a month or so ago, but let's examine this a little more closely and show what a liar and hypocrite Jay is.

One, when Mike Shanahan was fired, he whined for a trade. Eventually, that was smoothed over after talking with new coach Josh "I'm Only 32 But A Legend In My Own Mind" McDaniels.

Then news leaked out that McDaniels had the audacity to listen to trade offers for His Highness. What's that, Jay? You think you're like your boyfriend, Brett Favre, and can act like a de facto GM?

So after that horrifying news leaked out, it was done. Jay-Jay wanted a trade. He wouldn't return messages from the coach or the OWNER, Pat Bowlen. He even sacrificed a $100,000 bonus by not taking part in the team's off-season activities.

After the crybaby declined to return over 10 text messages a few days ago, the team said "Fuck off, bitch" and announced that if he wanted a trade, he'd get one.

And then Cutler had the fucking nerve to say that he never asked for a trade! WHAT? Are you serious, little boy? The spoiled brat said that he never expected it "to come to this".

YOU'RE the one who made it "come to this", Cutler. You're the one who embarrassed your team, your coach, your teammates, and your owner. You're the one who disrespected every Bronco fan in the world. And it's everybody else's fault but yours.

How Trent Dilfer of you.

And, of course, teams like Tampa, Washington, Cleveland, etc.... lined up to inquire. Cleveland bowed out when they heard that fuckass wouldn't want to be coached by Mangini.

WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

The rest of the teams bowed out when Chicago offered two first rounders, a third rounder, QB Kyle Orton for crybaby and a fifth rounder.

How's your ass feel, Chi-town? You just got schooled by a rookie head coach and rookie GM. The fans, of course, are deliriously happy right now. And for good reason: Crybaby is really good.

But will the baby be as good with a weakass group of wide receivers to throw to? Will the fans be happy when Cutler demands a new contract in the next day or two that will run around 40 to 50 million at least?

Will the fans be happy whenthey watche Denver draft high-quality starters with all of those draft picks?

Maybe.

Will the fans be happy when Cutler goes diva again if somebody actually criticizes him? Seriously, if he can't work with a strong-willed coach like Mangini or McDaniels, then Lovie Smith better start rubbing his feet the second he arrives for his press conference tomorrow.

Character counts. Sorry. Terrell Owens is a brilliant WR. A sure-fire Hall of Famer. But he's an asshole. He wears out his welcome really fast.

If TO had pulled this shit--and, really, he has in his own way--ESPN and Chi-town journalists would be ripping him a new one. Cutler pulls it and you hear crickets chirping.

But isn't Jay just another TO? One that leaks out info to the media and stays home and sulks? One that refuses to man up and meet his head coach man to man without his douche bag agent, Bus Cook (shockingly, the man who is also Brett the Diva's agent) holding his hand? One that refuses to talk to one of the most respected owners in the league?

He couldn't even do THAT?

I'm glad Tampa didn't get too caught up in this and give away the farm like Chicago. I'm glad Cleveland bowed out.

Cutler's often been called "the next Brett Favre". Well, he's as arrogant, self-centered and petulant as ol' Brett ever was, that's for sure.

Let's see if after a season or two, Chicago fans are lamenting the day they mortaged their future for a disrepectful, arrogant crybaby like "the next Brett Favre".

Don't cry, Denver fans. Winning cures everything, and I think the Broncos will be doing a lot of winning in a couple of seasons.

And Chicago can draft a top receiver for Cutler in....oh....say.....2011.

(Originally posted 4-3-2009)