I Hate To Say I Told You So....

Sorry my lovelies. There's not much to cheer about in Tampa. But cum up to GA and Buccaneer Lori will console you!

But I told you so....

DA's stats from Sunday's Browns/Bengals game:

26 for 48 for 269 yards, one touchdown pass, one rushing touchdown, and one interception. 10.3 yards per completion.

Quinn's stats for the first three games of the season:

45 for 74 for 400 yards, one touchdown pass (in garbage time against Minnesota), and three interceptions. Oh, and three fumbles. 8.8 yards per completion. It's pretty clear to see at this point that DA clearly can move the ball downfield whereas Quinn cannot. His game is dinking and dunking. Shit, Dilfer could do that.

I'm joking. Dilfer couldn't do anything. Aside from sucking.

Anyway, do the fucking math, Quinn cultists.

To be honest, I've been pretty hard on Browns fans in the past, and for the most part, some deserved it. They did boo DA when he blew out his knee. They did raise an overrated college quarterback to near mythical status, even before he threw one NFL pass.

But looking back, I think Browns Nation has been suffering from an infection. And this infection turned a quarterback debate into a raging case of Quinnitis. And where did this infection come from?

"Charlie Weiss is aftur me pot o' gold! Jimmy Clausen gives me a stiffie! Brady gets me little shamrock stiff!"

That's right! Notre Dame fans. After their boyfriend was drafted by Cleveland in 2007, it's amazing how many of these people became Browns fans!

Of course, they didn't give a shit about Cleveland. Cleveland just happened to be the team with the misfortune of buying into Quinn's greatness . And boy, these people shit on DA like crazy. It didn't matter that DA was passing for over 3,500 yards and leading the team to 10 wins. No, he was a pile of shit and Quinn HAD to be inserted immediately!

So DA started some last year, and later in the season was replaced by Quinn, who made the Quinninites giddy with a decent performace against a Bronco defense that was so weak I could've run for 500 yards and passed for a thousand.

Then Quinn got hurt. DA replaced him and got hurt (much to the delight of the sickass Quinn Circle Jerk Club). Then Ken Dorsey went down and was replaced by Bruce Gradowski. In other words.....the last six or so games were pretty much lost before they were even started.

So this offseason, Quinn beat DA--yeah right--in the QB competition. Quinn strokers got what they wanted: their beloved Quinn would show himself to be the savior this franchise needed.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPSSSSSSSSSSS!

Yeah, Quinn can't pass. Every knock on him coming out of college came to light. And man, he held onto the ball longer than old Charlie Frye used to!

Now they're screaming to "give BQ a chance". Oh? Like the chance you never gave to DA, as you were spending the 2007 season insulting him? Or in 2008, when you celebrated as he squirmed on the cold ground in pain? Or when you disparaged and dismissed his selection to the Pro Bowl after the 2007 season?

No, sorry. No double standards allowed. Not even for Bitchin' Brady Quinn. Or you hypocritical assholes.

Sorry, this is Dreamboat's third season in the league and he still can't make deep reads. He's been given his chance and showed jackshit. Now he sits again. The offense did nothing under Quinn except bog down. The minute DA came in, you could see the offense open and loosen opposing defenses.

Of course, the Quinn posse isn't done shitting on DA. They're even more pissed now. Tough shit.

I'm not saying that real Browns fans aren't guilty of the Quinn-stroking. Not at all. But the infection that came from Norte Dame assholes that couldn't let Quinn leave their pathetic, loser lives made the problem so much worse.

He is the wind.........beneath their wingggggggggsssssss..............

Browns nation, DA is your antibiotic to the fuckhead infection you've been suffering from.

I really feel sorry for whatever team drafts current ND QB/Douchebag Jimmy Clausen. Because when it happens, that team will have a huge increase in loud, stupid, obnoxious "fans".

And they'll be as convinced of Clausen's greatness as they have been of Quinn's.

Quinn cultists, feel free to support your noodle-armed hero as he settles into his ultimate NFL destiny: back up quarterback.

Real Browns fans, I apologize. I made a mistake. I ripped you guys way too hard. Some of you deserved it, but I just hadn't made the diagnosis that you were infected by ND swine flu.

Now shut the fuck up and get behind DA and let HIM develop. If you show some patience, he might just develop into a pretty good QB. And best of all, that nasty ND infection will clear up. And when that does, the actual Browns fans who still believe in Brady will eventually come to see the light and give up the vigil.

Or not. After all, an obsession is an obsession, right? And there's no cure for herpes, either. But like with any other STD, the best cure is prevention. So always wear rubbers and never draft an Notre Dame QB.

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Speaking of infections (and swine), Braylon Edwards is gone. Addition by subtraction.

More proof that no matter what the geniuses at ESPN say, Mangini and Kokinis know their shit.

In case you hadn't heard, Edwards got into an altercation with a friend of LeBron James on Monday morning and beat him up. All 130 pounds of him. What a big, tough guy Edwards is.

Of course, some Browns fans are missing the point, but 90 percent or so get how great this move is. Mangini traded Edwards to the Jets for 2010 3rd and 5th round picks, a wide receiver (with better stats than Edwards this season), and a special teams standout.

Edwards sucks more cock than I did on Frat Boy Booze Weekend (I made that up, of course).

Since he was drafted in 2004, he's been a self-centered, inconsistent, immature narcissist. Shit, he was flat-out pissed that Miami didn't take him. No, Savage did, of course.

Edwards has always craved the big-city lights of Miami, New York, and Dallas. You see, he's a star and should be showcased accordingly. Just ask him.

Now to his credit, Edwards blew the top off Cleveland Browns Stadium in 2007. He and DA combined for 16 touchdown passes and Edwards hauled in over 1,000 passing yards.

Over course, that was his one good season. The rest of the time, he's a ball-dropping machine. Last Sunday, in the Browns' best effort of the season, BE dropped a ball delivered right to his hands. And that's how he spent last season: dropping balls. Athletic as can be, as inconsistent as can be. In the second Ravens/Browns game last season, he dropped more balls than a hooker with Vaseline on her lips.

He's been a locker room cancer. He undermined Romeo Crennel. Braylon's always wanted what he wants, and feels that's more important than the team. He's your typical diva wide receiver.

Me, me, me, me and, of course, me.

Good luck in New York, you overrated bitch. I'm just glad Rah-Suck Morris didn't want to give Mangini five first round draft picks for him.

I'm still vomiting over the Kellen Winslow trade.

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So, how's the Morris regime doing in Tampa?

Oh yeah. 0 and 4.

I can hear you now: "BL, you consistently suck up to Mangini and Kokinis....yet insult and complain about Morris and Mark Dominik. Both teams are winless! Oh, and you have one insanely hot ass. So what gives?"

Uh, there's a difference between the two situations. ManKok inherited a team devestated by four years of shitty, self-indulgent drafting and free agent signings by "GM" Phil Savage. Savage consistently drafted players Romeo Crennel couldn't use and overspent on free agents that weren't worth it. And most of those players are gone now. ManKok inherited a shipwreck and has to start from scratch.

Morris and Dummynik, on the other hand, inherited a well-stocked team that was well under the salary cap. They inherited a team that was consistently in contention for the playoffs.

And they gutted it.

Then they traded for Kellen Winslow, so he could spend the last couple of years collecting his workman's comp checks from the Glazers. He's a nothing. Always has been, always will be.

And did I say that getting Byron Leftwich was a smart move in my last entry? Well, even I can be wrong (rare as it is). Now we have Josh Johnson starting at QB. And we're grooming Josh Freeman as our QB of the future. Gah-BARF!

Yeah, getting rid of Gruden and Allen was brilliant!

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Here's a little present for you Quinn bitches!

Quinn shows his blowing technique.


Quinn shows....uh.....



"Hello? Is this the Academy for Overrated Quarterbacks?"

Hey, don't fumble THAT ball, BQ!

Hope you didn't run out of Kleenex, Quinnies! Whoa!